Will pay $5 for an assisted grocery trip adventure.
Plus $5 bonus if you keep me from picking up any food that contains milk, cheese, tomato-based product (pasta, ketchup, ect), greasy foods, soda, and any candy or junk food. Pretty much any type of food not suitable for someone fighting crohn’s disease.
I put up a good fight and like a stubborn five-year-old, I will secretly place junk food in the carriage and deny your false accusations that the can of pizza flavored pringles was part of my diabolical plan but since it’s already in there, I should buy it anyway—fuck you it’s my money.
Here’s a penguin: